Homeschooling

Part one: The Decision

I (we, although ultimately it had to be my decision) have decide to give homeschooling a go around. This has not been a decision I have entered into lightly, quite the opposite actually. For that reason, I wanted to post my thoughts on this decision for myself and for others.

For the past month and a half I have searched endlessly for the right schooling option (and in the past when we have made changes). This searching has included dragging my husband to multiple school open houses, endless internet searching and chatting with a great homeschooling family. At every school there were piece I loved and pieces I didn’t. I had honestly thought I found the right school with Coastal Christian. It had strong Christian values, a good feel, the school had goals it was working on and the teaching staff seemed on the ball. All the while though my heart was being tugged in a different direction . . . homeschooling.

I would constantly talk about the option of homeschooling when discussing our schooling option with everyone around me. Most people would grin and say something polite about it, but no one was truly supportive of the idea (at least in my mind). So I kept telling myself I couldn’t do it, but my mind and my heart kept coming back to it over and over again. Since Serafina was born, Matt and I have discussed home school and that we believed it would be a great option for our kids. But then life situations changed and we rolled with our ever changing situation and that landed us educating our children outside the home which included private and public education with Sam. None of which have worked out to what we expected. Every time we came to a cross road we discussed homeschooling, but I turned the other direction and went a different way. This time around I tried desperately to get Matt to make the decision on schooling; I knew his first choice was homeschooling and hoped if he made the decision I wouldn’t have to make the choice. I wanted everyone on board and everyone was not on board. Matt kept telling me I had to make the final choice. He would, of course support me 100%, but in the end I would be home day in and day out.

So I continued to fill out application after application for different schools and finally had convinced myself that Coastal Christian was the right school and would please everyone. It was decided, and I would turn in the Coastal Christian application with the non-refundable $600.00.

Then I went to Church. Our pastor was speaking on Genesis 15:6 Abram believed in the Lord, and he credited it to him as righteousness. To be honest the first part my head was else were (most likely thinking about schools) but then the Pastor went into how we use this verse and my brain turned on. He was discussing the wrong places to find/measure your righteousness, for example you can’t find righteousness in your family or children, or your work. But then he touched momentarily on the way others measure your righteousness apart from Christ. He said we are people pleasers, and we allow others to tell us where we stand: his example was that of a treadmill that other people set for us and we are running on it trying to keep up but eventually we will fall off. I realized then that this was what I was doing. I was allowing other to determine my choices. For the last month I have been running on their treadmills and not stopping and listening to what God has planned for my family or what is in my heart. I believe He (GOD) has put homeschooling in my heart. My husband made a great point in an e-mail to me today that we must take this year as a trail and we may fail but that is fine because my righteousness is not tied to my family or homeschooling success! What a great thought, and it made me happy that our minds were on the same track that the Pastor set them on.

So the day came to turn in the application, and I couldn't. I could not lay down the non-refundable money for spots in a school I was not ready to full except, and that made me realize that I am ready to fully except homeschooling. Not a commitment forever but a commitment for a year. When I made a list of things important to me and my family they all seem to fall inline with homeschooling. Not to mention, now that I have made the commitment to take on this life changing challenge I am filled with relief and excited about the adventure ahead. I haven't given a second thought to the other choices.

Still this is pushing my comfort zones because I normally go with the crowd and I know most people in my life don’t believe I am ready to take on such a challenge or think it is the right choice. These are all people I have always relied on to help guide my decisions and this is probably the first time I will be going against their thoughts. I have to trust in God, my husband, and myself that we are making the correct decision. Over the next year we will discover if this will work or not and can re-evaluate this time next year. I may crash and burn and end up putting them all in school the following year with a big told you so from those around me but at least I can say I gave it my best and not always wonder what if.

Stay tuned for our plans on how we are going to home school: support, curriculum, etc. I am so excited to share all that I have learned and will be learning!